Hello fellow Risk A Day bloggers and readers! I am deep in the prairie of Eastern Colorado, (also known as wheat country) this week for a long overdue visit with my precious Mother and my two awesome sisters!
Webster’s Dictionary defines Optimism as: “1: A doctrine that this world is the best possible world, 2: an inclination to put the most favorable construction upon actions and happenings or to anticipate the best possible outcome”.
Yep, that’s me, definition number 2, most of the time. Probably 99% of the time. I DO look for and believe in the best in people and in life. I am the queen of second, third and fourth chances. Oh, I have moments in which I can rant and rave with the best of them. People and events can annoy me, upset me and frustrate me, driving me to “pull my hair out” and “bang my head on a brick wall”. Usually, I find some wonderful person who will let me vent and then I go on with my life. (Okay, I’m human; sometimes it takes more than one venting session.) Somewhere though, along this wonderful and bumpy road of life, my optimism came into full bloom and I decided that being sad, angry and holding grudges etc., for long periods of time takes way too much time and energy. It’s exhausting and it can take over your life.
Although my life has had its share of trials and bumps in the road, it does rock along pretty well and I love my life. Being an “Optimist” though, has gotten me in trouble. Recently I was called a “fixer”, as in I try to “fix” people and situations. Hmmmm……..I never looked at it from that perspective. Am I somehow mis-communicating myself when I bring my voice, my thoughts, and my views into a discussion? Is it wrong to want the lives of the people I care about to rock along pretty well too? Am I contributing too much and not listening enough? Was calling me a “fixer” just someone else shoving their bad mood/day/month/year at me? Or, is this just the risk I run for having an optimistic personality?
I don’t believe I have a Pollyanna view of life though. I know there are times to call it quits, to walk away from people and situations that are not healthy for us. But, instead of living a life wallowing in whatever tragedies and dramas are happening, I much prefer the risks of looking for some ray of brightness, the risks of trying to find the silver lining or the rainbow after the rain.
I’ve learned I like being an “Optimist”, even if it also means I risk being called a “fixer” from time to time. (I will however to try listen a little more and contribute a little less.)
So, as I continue my journey of self reflection and this journey called life, I will risk looking for and celebrating all the positives and blessings in each and every day. I will continue to risk “anticipating the best possible outcome”.
Helen Medve is recently retired and is currently trying to figure out where her life will take her next. She wears many hats: wife, mother, daughter, grandmother, sister, ex-professional person, friend. She is excited about where life will take her next, and invites you along on her journey.
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You made me think about my latest learnings from this month’s Oprah mag–Thich Nhat Hanh teaches us to practice “compassionate listening”. Even though you have “just the fix” for someone who is telling you their woes, compassionate listening keeps you still, holding a place of peace for that person, and if after the dust settles, sharing advice at a later date when they are past the trauma and can listen, too. You also remind me of my husband who holds your philosophy of looking for the positives. I bet you are a great friend!
Optimism is not for the faint-of-heart. As a hopeful-romantic, I can’t image approaching life any other way.