I have recently returned to therapy, having assimilated the learnings and experiences of my last therapy experience and being willing, yet again, to peel the next layer of the  onion.  The new-to-me therapist with whom I am now working focuses on issues with/of food and body image, working with her clients (me!) to find out for what they (I!) are (am) REALLY hungry.  For me, as I’m guessing is the case with most, if not all, others who have food and body image issues, it’s really NOT about the food.  For me, it’s been primarily about the sexual abuse I experienced as a child at the hands of three identified perpetrators.  What I’m beginning to get a sense of this time is that there is probably at least one additional perpetrator of overt sexual abuse, and I’m also beginning to realize and acknowledge that my mother and father were negligent in their parental roles because they didn’t keep me safe from the abuse (even though they knew about it).  I can find all sorts of reasons and excuses for them, and for my abusers (both remembered and not), and those reasons and excuses are likely legitimate.  However, it doesn’t matter!  Another positive result of this round of therapy is that I’m in the very beginning stages of retrieving my memories and, with those memories, a better sense of myself.  Nothing is very clear so far and, yet, I’m beginning to have very specific memories of people, places, and occurrences.  For today, I am risking eating what is healthy and appropriate to eat (both in what I eat and the quantity I consume); I am risking NOT eating the items and the amounts that are not as healthy for me to consume; and I am risking remembering — REALLY remembering — the who’s, the what’s, the where’s and the how’s of my past.  As scary as it might feel in any given moment, I am very much looking forward to knowing who I really am and from where I really came.  Omein.

Dawna E. Wade is a Certified Spiritual Counselor and Spirit Coach, an Angel Therapy Practitioner and a Certified Hypnotherapist. She is well equipped to be your spiritual coach, psychic counselor, clairvoyant, medium, and your intuitive guide through the spiritual world. She would love to help you along your spiritual path. Visit Dawna's website. She also designs and creates custom over-clothing for women of all sizes (vests, jackets, coats, tunics, etc.) through her business Over-The-Tops (http://over-the-tops.com).
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