I have been practicing yoga off and on for fourteen years now. More off than on, quite frankly. I cannot explain why there has been more off time, considering how much I love yoga and how yoga has always been there for me (when I showed up), but it is the reality. Because of the emotional turmoil of my teen years I developed an odd resistance to things which were good for me. I gave many of those “off” years to cigarettes and depression, I suppose, and let me tell you, you cannot have a consistent yoga practice and be a depressed smoker at the same time (make no mistake: this depressed smoker was disguised as someone having a lot of fun). In fact, I’m pretty sure that smoking cigarettes is the exact polarity of a pranayama practice!
We all make these trade-offs along the way, and usually we know when we are giving ourselves the short end of the stick. I knew ten years ago that I had a special relationship with yoga – that I could bring yoga to people, or translate, if you will – but I was so unwilling to part with my last little bit of teen angst and petulance that it didn’t seem worth it at the time. It felt like sacrifice. It felt like giving up something I loved. It did not feel like freeing myself from the enslavement of addiction and rewarding myself with something that brought me true joy and calm. So I lit another menthol and decided to think about it a little longer…
In early 2009 (no longer smoking or depressed) it occurred to me that I wanted to teach yoga to teenagers. Those are the years during which so much of our programming gets locked in, and many adults never seem to transcend it. I want to help kids find the strength and balance – in body, mind, and spirit – to navigate the white squalls of high school life with their dignity and identity intact. In August I got my first yoga teacher certification, and today – November 2nd – I taught my first kids’ and teens’ yoga class!
Here’s what I learned (which I believe applies to all risk):
1 – Leap!
2 – Have a detailed plan – be very prepared.
3 – Forget your plan. Go with energy flow in the room.
4 – Laugh.
5 – Note the net that appeared when you weren’t looking. (Moment of gratitude for net)
6 – NEVER convince yourself that ANY group is a “tough audience” – only outpicture the best possibilities
7 – ALWAYS remember, in every situation, that people are people. If you look them in the eyes, smile, and be authentic, you will experience the best of everyone you meet.
8 – Stop punishing self for “wasted time” or anything else that rings of mistake- or regret-like energy. Those lessons will become tools if we let them.
9 – Ten minutes of meditation (or quiet centering) can open ten doors in your heart, your mind, and on your path. Never once have I wished I hadn’t taken the time to meditate!
10 – Loosen your white-knuckled clinging attachment to a particular outcome. Indulge in the satisfaction of a risk well-taken and start planning your next one…
…which is, for me, to escape to a north Georgia cabin alone to complete my first book.
Namaste!
Andrea Lea is a writer who is cracking the code of the symbolic and recording the spiritually hilarious. Her adventures so far have included several years and a cooking show in post-Apartheid South Africa, a stint in rural south Georgia, a brief but sparkling singing career which she intends to revive, and a glorious indigo daughter named Dom. When she's not painting, taking photos, writing, singing, or doing laundry, Andrea can be found in her kitchen, channeling her grandmother through new recipes, and feeding folks.
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Amazing, Andrea! Your risk has actually inspired me to… consider trying yoga again (even though I’m not a teenager, lol). Bravo.
Congratulations on your teaching certificate and first class! A nice list of tips – and #7 particularly resonates with me.
(Your lovely post reminded me of this)
After 20 plus years of not smoking – I’ve recently found myself in that place again. I know what I really want to do is reclaim and “re-do” a period of time in my life. To be that girl again and make some different decisions. I asked a friend for help and here is the note I recieved. It has helped…I had never considered it from this point of view and I wonder what you all will think..
“I am using this gentle moment to caution you against doing anything that might harm you physically. I have to remind myself that certain substances are not the proper playthings of a responsibly-lived life. So, too, for you. My solution had always been simply to put it down. These habits are manifestations of self-destruction, which is merely vanity spun out of control.
So, as Ezra Pound himself admonishes: Pull down thy vanity. Pull down.”
Beautiful, Andrea!
I love your 10 Steps to Taking a Risk! Just had to share … smoking and yoga will forever be linked for me. It was a book on yoga that convinced me to quit smoking exactly 30 years ago. I had given up my job in San Francisco, rented a tiny cottage on the beach in St. Augustine, Florida, and decided to just chill out for a few months. Found a book on yoga and thought, sounds good, I’ll learn yoga. In the introduction the author wrote something like, “By the way, if you smoke and intend to learn yoga, you’re an idiot and we want nothing to do with you.” So I thought, “OK, I guess I’d better give up smoking then …” Of course I realized that if I quit smoking but allowed myself to eat, I would eat everything not nailed down to compensate, so I had to stop eating too. 5 days into my fast, I was a confirmed nonsmoker and never touched another cigarette, altho the yoga commitment didn’t stick. But your post has inspired me to go at it again. Namaste!
whew, that’s so good…i have got the whitest knuckles around…working on prying them loose. so glad to get this blog today!
Andrea,
You always amaze me with your eloquent way of expressing yourself. I just adore reading your blogs, essays and poems. Can’t wait to read your book, once it is completed! Yoga…I need to give it another try, as you often comment how you love it so. Enjoyed your top 10 list. Made me smile.
Hugs!
You rock girl – I’m really proud of you for so many things most of all always following your bliss! Keep it going, whatever “it” is and always keep me in the loop…I so enjoy reading whatever it is you put into words. Love and Hugs