“I don’t know why I can’t take anything out of that house.” I said while asking my partner for help emptying the last of my possessions from my rental home in Decatur, GA.
“It seems to be something about the house; I have the same problem and so did the previous owner.” she said. She’s right; I’ve even left some of the stuff that the previous owner left behind because she thought I could use them. I knew that the baby changing table was going to come in really handy for a single, 45 year old, lesbian who only wants dog children. I was able to donate that and some other pieces to charity; now I have to do the same with my stuff. I guess it’s because I don’t want to fully break the ties with the house. The previous renters started as roommates so it was not an issue to keep my stuff there, even after I moved out to live with my partner, it was perfectly fine to leave my stuff there. It was also a good excuse to go back and check on the house (one renter turned out to be a bit of a wing nut, so frequent “checking” became important). It’s always a risk to let someone into your house, even as a tenant. But I’ve listed the house on craigslist again, and today I’m going over to finish removing my possessions from the house. They will go to my new home, charity or the trash as is appropriate. The risks are in breaking my ties as well as letting someone move into my house and make it their home. I can do this.
Lori Buff is a successful artist and website designer from East Atlanta Village where she lives with her partner and five dogs. Lori enjoys working in the garden, riding motorcycles and doing volunteer work but when she's not busy running around, she can be found engrossed in a good book.
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Even when we know it’s ultimately for the good, moving on and cleaning out can still be a hard thing to do. I’ve been in pretty heavy give away/throw away mode lately myself, and it’s made me sad even at the same time it’s felt good. Good luck with carrying out your intentions and experiencing the freedom of less stuff!
I’m proud of you Lori – yes, you can do this. As Kory points out, with the loss comes freedom.
Love you!
You’re right–that can be so hard. Seems like sometimes we fear the letting go, as if we lose the memories or ‘good’ that came from those things. Hard as it is, sure sounds like you’re being honest in the acts of it. And that you’ll love what this feels like, when you’re last out of that house.
I’m proud of you, too, Lori (if I am allowed to say that). As hard as it seems, I have to believe that it will create space for more good to come in… And, I am trying to remember that for myself. As you know, I have quite a bit of “stuff” myself.
Thanks everyone, the funny thing is, it’s not a lot of stuff. The issue seems more about what to do with the stuff and separating myself from the house.
The good news is that we got a bunch of it over to Goodwill last weekend, and a couple of bags into the trash so it’s near complete. It feels good to have made progress.