My job over the past year has been full of growth and learning brand new skills – I am building computer based learning classes and am learning how to use video and other media to be creative and interactive. Last week, I was given an award of ‘excellence’ at work for the online classes I have been creating!

Years ago I thought I could do life all on my own, I had a wall of toughness up and no one could reach me. When I finally hit bottom with my personal issues, I was able to get out of denial and started facing my fears and asking for help, but then I was scared of everything!!! But as I slowly walked through the pain of the past, and was willing to take responsibility and look at my part I started to grow every day I became more open, more intimate, and more willing to change and take risks. Change (good or bad) is challenging for me. But I have learned to take one step at a time and walk through the fear and life has provided me with more joy and more opportunities than I could of imagined.

Eleanor Roosevelt said “you must do the thing you think you can not do” that is a slogan I try to remember and live by when I have risks in life to take that feel overwhelming. It gives me courage to try and then I remember to take a very small step in that direction and then one day at a time life happens and change happens and I grow despite myself!

There are still good days and bad days, but I prefer to look at it as good days and growth days!

Anita Horsley lives in Eugene, OR with her life partner of 9 years. She works for the Oregon State Fire Marshal office as a training & development specialist and was a firefighter for 10 years prior to that. She won the World Champion firefighter combat challenge in 2005 in addition to the State and National championship 2004-2006. She loves the outdoors, running in the woods with her dogs and traveling. Visit Anita's website.
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