i had a fun conversation the other day with one of my great Susan friends. and as we chatted about trying to pay attention to our lives better, she asked me:  “what’s a good way to say that?”

and out of my mouth–before i even took a second to think–came the words “oh i think it all boils down to: Go Light the Light”

and that sentence reminds me of how i have saved and kept those pretty scented candles (the more expensive kind, the ones with fancy earthy decorations and holders etc)….AS IF i’m saving them for some day that’s more important than today (?!). and i realized, in the very moment that i was answering this question to her that i really mean this very message to me and to anybody else who can use it: go find that fancy candle, don’t save it for tomorrow, it’s meant to be used! get your book of matches out and savor a few moments with it.

seems i’ve done that with ‘all kinds of fancy things’: Kept Them For Some Day Later When I’ll Use Them (a luscious bottle of bubblebath, a great bottle of wine, a new book by my favorite author, even a box of fun cookies). don’t know why i do this, except for that scarcity mentality idea…like somehow i just won’t have enough, so i must hold on to things.  like somehow there’ll be a day when i need those more than i do now. like someday there’ll be Just The Right Moment.

and it occurs to me that someday i’m gonna go to my Reward (who knows, it could be later this week? or later next year? ) and my people will come find inside my home all these pretty, unused candles, and these undog-earred books all ready to read, and these dessert options stacked ready & waiting in the pantry…and these gorgeous bottles of bubblebath, stored and not yet opened.

i ask you (and i ask me right this minute): what the bleep am i waiting for? those lovely things are meant to be used–that fun top in my closet is meant to be worn and enjoyed (not protected and wrapped up). that gorgeous bowl of my grandmother’s is meant to be taken off the shelf and used to serve tomorrow night’s salad. that cannister of fancy hot chocolate is meant to be poured, steaming, into a fun mug and enjoyed.

and that fancy, expensive, scented candle is meant to be lit…to be used…to have its wick go down and down, to fill the air with that heavenly lavendar aroma.

each of these items (savely stored, protected, and wrapped up) is quiet where it is now, but that’s not what they were invented for! who knows, a Will Smith “independence day” movie of the end of the world may actually come true tomorrow…and i’ll have missed out on those wonderful tastes and new words and scents and textures.

things are meant to be bally-hooed, worn out, emptied…and wicks are meant to be worn down to their last nubs.

because of this great community of Riskers and Life-Lesson-ers, i’m daring myself to paying attention to what objects i might be stashing, protecting, saving, storing…..the ones that are meant instead to be used up and worn out and enjoyed and loved and savored.

I’m going to find that scented candle right now. going to light it up and savor its scent and watch its flame dance.

that’s the spirit of the whole thing.

Claudia Brogan is a lifelong trainer and educator, having worked and taught at universities in student leadership, psychology, student advising, and counseling. Lately, she's foraying into doing training in the public health arena, which is a very different world indeed, a risk in itself! She'll try anything once, if it sounds fun, and so she’s joining this circle of resourceful, colorful, gutsy women – what the hell?! Claudia can be reached on Facebook.
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